And now for something completely different

2024 on Not That You Asked

Hello and a Happy New Year to all of you! If I’d bothered to write a post on New Year’s Day 2023, I’d have written to about 120 of you. Now there are just shy of 600 of you, so I’ll start my first post of 2024 with some gratitude: thank you so much! When I started writing Not That You Asked I didn’t think I’d be able to get more than a dozen of you to read my writing even semi-regularly, but now if we all clubbed together we could probably buy a small island nation. Perhaps that can be one of our collective goals for the year.

This post is a change from our regular programming, which usually involves me making an arsehole of myself somewhere in the world. Despite the title of this post, which was pure clickbait to give your hungover heads a real old jolt, there will be plenty more of that in 2024. But there will be some changes, so I thought I’d pop in right at the start of the year, just when you’ve got rid of all the rest of your unwanted houseguests, to tell you what’s coming up in 2024.

Making an arsehole of myself.

As mentioned above, this will not stop in 2024. It’s not something I’ve been able to stop doing since I started in the summer of 1996. Most Mondays you will receive a post in your inbox that contains me going somewhere, looking at some things, telling you whether I liked them or not, and generally making an arsehole of myself in the process.

I say “most Mondays” because there will probably be about 3 of these a month, and a quick scan of my calendar tells me that most months have more than 3 Mondays. So, most Mondays. Some months there will be more than 3, I’m sure, but my promise to you, at the start of this brand spanking new year, is that there won’t be less than 3.

That sounds like a whole lot of Tom Fish. Have you got anything else?

Why yes, I have. If you were to get bored of me (though I can’t see that happening anytime soon), I’m starting a new series here on Not That You Asked. And if I can briefly toot my own horn for just a second, it’s going to be really quite fantastic.

That’s because I’m not really writing them.

Each post will be 8 quick-ish travel questions with some of my favourite fellow Substackers. I’ve had a sneak preview of

M. E. Rothwell

’s answers, which will land in your inbox in January, and they’re fascinating. Speedy Boarding will come careering your way twice a month and I’m really excited to be sharing lots of my favourite people and their writing with you all.

As a bonus, for those of you who really are sick of me this early in the year, Speedy Boarding is like my secondary school’s production of Sweeney Todd, in that I am technically part of it, but in such a minor role that I’m inconsequential to the overall outcome.

Show me the money.

And finally the most substantial change to Not That You Asked in 2024 is that you can give me actual cold hard cash. You can now become a paid subscriber and for that you will receive all of the above, as well as two travel “guides” a month. I wrote “guides” with its accompanying punctuation because they will be about a specific part of the world or something to do, but they won’t just be, as an example, the Ten Things You MUST Do In London This Summer.

Instead I’ll pick a topic that I think I could write something at least vaguely interesting about and actually provide some recommendations, rather than my usual fare of, as I say, making an arsehole of myself.

In January the two guides you can get your hands on are about eating in Paris, and London’s parks. And you can get these two guides for the bargain price of £4.99 a month, or the equivalent of that in euros, dollars, crowns, etc. It’s not quite the price of a cup of coffee (though the way the economy is looking, it shouldn’t be too long until it is), but it’s cheaper than Netflix, and where on Netflix can you see someone making an arsehole of themselves?

Okay, so you probably can see that on Netflix, but unlike Netflix I won’t put the prices up every three months and then shame you for sponging off your ex-boyfriend’s account.

So if that sounds like good value to you, please do consider becoming a paid subscriber. It also goes to supporting me (pause for dramatic effect) as a writer and an artist. I would eventually like to just be a writer, full-time, and so fairly obviously, the more people who support my work financially, the more chance there is of that becoming a reality.

But as my comment about the economy shows, times are certainly, if not tough, then at least a bit chewy, and I’ll be writing 3 blogs and sending 2 Speedy Boarding’s your way each month for free. You’ll also get the previews of the “guides” even if you aren’t a paid subscriber, so you’ll be able to read a little bit, just to tease you.

I’m really excited for 2024 here, and if you are too, please consider telling someone you love, like, or even just pass on the street about Not That You Asked. I’d be incredibly grateful and it will stop me hounding you for money and support for at least, oh, ten minutes.

But really, thank you for supporting my writing just by being here. I feel very lucky that so many of you have stuck around so far and I’m looking forward to seeing you in the rest of 2024.

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Some housekeeping.

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